We start each brand new year with sayings like “this year I’m turning over a new leaf!” or “out with the old, in with the new” but the problem is, we’ve spent so much time investing in those old habits it is so hard to just sweep them out the door, we instead sweep them under the rug, so we can pull them out when no one is looking and wrap ourselves up with the comfort of them once more!
My thoughts are jumbled. This blog is quite different from the previous and most certainly of a more personal nature. I was about to start this post off with an apology. To say that I’m sorry for the disorderly nature of my writing, and ask you, the reader, to bear with me… but the truth is, if you want to, you will and if you can’t be bothered, you wont, regardless of my apology. I apologize too often. I take on the guilt and shame of actions that have little to do with me or my control. I seek permission for things that are at the same time both my right by virtue of being alive and not within the permission-granting domain of whom I am seeking it from. If that makes sense, then maybe you know where I am coming from.